Had A ‘Tude

I don’t want to say this too loudly, but I think my three-year-old has been switched for a calmer, happier, identical-looking three-year-old. It’s been about 36 hours since he has cried or melted down about something. I’ve witnessed him speaking calmly to his vehicle-usurping little brother, instead of shrieking our windows to shards. He’s voluntarily…

The Things I Have To Pretend I Don’t Hear

I’m lying here nursing the l’il captain to sleep for his nap. The big boys are supposed to be playing with “crazy foam stuff” at the table. Instead I hear through the wall a muffled drum sound, which means someone has climbed up on the book shelf. Then I hear money shaking, coins falling behind the bookshelf, gears turning – they think they are sneaking gum balls. Somehow they teleport to the top of the stairs, because I hear what must be an entire refrigerator fall down the stairs. Oh, what will be lying asunder at the bottom? Sleep, Elijah. This is melting my brain!

Too Many Doostractions

To add to my “if I turn scientist” list of studies: Effect of offspring leg length on maternal response. I just randomly noticed that there is a particular age or size of child that completely changes my reaction to having toes in my face. Babies start off so small and squishy and I want to roll them into a little ball in my arms and chew on them. Their little legs are so stubby and their feet, so chubby, and so nibble-y and kissable. Then one day, somewhere between Elijah-size and Isaac-size, I get a foot in my face, and my gut reaction glowers get that clunky hoof off of me! They haven’t yet stopped being precious, but suddenly they’re more adorable from a distance.