Based on this small sample of recent memorable quotes/moments, the world would be pretty interesting, and probably a lot more fun if we did it their way:

Ian, fiddling with one of my bras: Mom! I just unhooked your backpack nipple thing!

Ian: Mommmmm! I’m ready for a wiiiiiiipe!
Brian: Ian, mom is busy cooking, can I do it?
Ian: *Sigh* Fine. But don’t ask me again.
Brian: You mean I may never ask to wipe you again?
Ian: Yes. You save up some money for Disney, and you can wipe me there.

Ian, playing the keyboard: I was just playing “Mary Had a Little Lamb.” It ate her. She chose the wrong lamb.

Isaac, any time he wonders about our inventory: Mom, are we on  ______ (insert: orange juice/cereal/other)?

Isaac, carried straight from bed to the van for an early morning departure: Can I bring my pajamas along in case I get sleepy?
Ian, in the same situation: Is it time to go to Stone Mountain? I mean Great Wolf…(thinking and failing to come up with the word)…shoot.
On the night before aforementioned trip, his best friend spent the night with his mom in our guest room. While we were crawling into bed, we realized Ian wasn’t in the room. Brian found him, in the dark, squatted down, staring at his best friend’s shoes with a headlamp. That’s how much he likes his friend.

Mom: Ian, eat your oatmeal.
Ian, staring at instant oatmeal package: Mom, it says I’m supposed to watch TV first.
Me: No, sorry. That’s a picture of a microwave. I’ve done that part already.